Volume 1, Number 8
June 17, 2005
In this issue:
I've spent quite a bit of time on the road the past five weeks. Sixteen days between mid-May and today, with six more to go before the month of June folds up her tent...
There's more travel to come, and while it's all good stuff, it does have an impact on what happens at home. I'm viewing work, family and fatherhood from a whole different perspective these days. My assumptions about how all the pieces are "supposed" to fit together are being turned over and shaken up...
All this brings us to this month's fittingly late feature, "Wanderlust Revisited."
While this ain't exactly a journal of my newly adopted rock & roll lifestyle, it is an honest look at one man's return to the road.
Pull out your travelling shoes, clean your driving glasses, and settle in...
Oh, and before you get lost in your road atlas, if you're not yet a DadsNews subscriber, then accept this invitation to jump aboard! ...And will you kindly pass DadsNews on to others folks?
As always, thanks for spreading the word!
Keep those virtual cards and letters coming - I love to hear from you...
Feature Story: Wanderlust Revisited
I grew up in a travelling family. While we didn't exactly live on the road, my folks made it a point to take the four of us kiddies on several vacations each year. All of us learned that the world was a pretty big place, that there was lots to see and do, and that no two beaches, cities or mountains are alike - even if they are on the same side of the continent.
Rather than asking, "how are your folks?" friends will inquire, "... so exactly where are your parents this week?" To this very day, we all travel whenever - and wherever- we get the chance.
There is something about travel that just gets into one's DNA. Wanderlust is a true force of nature. Look into the eyes of a life-long traveller, and you'll notice something different - a kind of knowing, mischievious sparkle that seems to say, "I have a plan... I have a map... I have tickets... I've eaten scary things in unusual places - and I'll be doing it again soon!"
I can already see the bug growing in Cai, who's spent a fair amount of time on the road already. Though he asks "are we there yet?" over and over again, it feels more in the spirit of play than the energy of "get me outta this car already!"
Travelling with the family is one thing. Travelling with one or two close friends is another. Travelling alone for work is something else entirely - and it's relatively new terrain for me...
Back in April I "auditioned" for a training position with the organization I did my coaching studies with - CTI - the Coaches Training Institute. I got the job, which in itself is the fulfillment of a dream I've had for many years. (All of this is rich fodder for more stories later on...) The work involves quite a bit of travel, which I certainly enjoy. The nature of that travel, though, is a little different. Basically, it's me and my carry-on flying in on Thursday, co-leading a weekend course, then flying home on Sunday evening. It's the daily "how was your day - I love you - I miss you - goodnight" phone call kind of travel...
Hmmm... What to do..? I wanted to be very conscious about what I was choosing...
There's the work itself - teaching CoActive Coaching, which I think is some of the greatest stuff since the invention of trees. (Mexican food is also in the top ten, just in case you were wondering...) There's visiting friends whom I wish I could see more often. There's rubbing elbows and working with folks I've looked up to for years. There's the thrill of meeting new people and witnessing their growth. There's the pure, child-like joy of having my nose glued to an airplane window, watching the world go by from six miles up...
...And then there is the sting of leaving Cai and Danielle back home, wishing they were looking out the same window, watching the world go by...
I went back and forth in my thinking (and feeling) about all this well in advance of jumping in. I listened to my head, felt my gut. Then I listened to my gut and felt my head. I thought, "what message does me - running off for days at a time - chasing my dream - send to my son? Is this going to mess him up?" Then I thought, "what message does denying my dream send to my son? That's sure to mess him up..."
I sat and I thought and I thought and I sat. Then I did all over again...
One truth is that the realization of this particular dream carries with it a real mixed bag of emotions. For all the wonder and satisfaction, it hurts to walk out the door.
Another truth is that there are a whole lot of folks out there who have left dreams on doorsteps, in attics, on napkins in coffee shops, on ledgers hidden in piano benches... The thought of that kind of pain makes walking out the door - however much it hurts - seem like an encouraging, gentle pat on the back.
I've revisited my wonderlust many times in many contexts. It's real. ...And it still includes my little family.
I'll be hitting the road for CTI beginning in July. I'll be doing work I love, leaving people I love in order to do it. While I'm away I'll miss them - and I'll love them from a distance. When I get home I'll still love them. I have it on authority that they will continue to love me.
I'll be collecting those frequent flyer miles and setting them aside for journeys with Cai and Danielle. We're planning on taking some awesome trips together...
Quote of the Month
A man travels the world over in search of what he needs and returns home to find it.
"A Better Way to Work"
The heart of any fulfilling, successful and sustainable business flows best from deep within the heart of those creating it...
"A Better Way to Work" is a juicy, lively 5-Month intensive program for men, women or couples starting off in pursuit of their entrepreneurial calling. Send me a note or gimme a ring at 518.580.0550.
Creativity: Power, Paradox and Birthright
This four-part teleclass is for those who want:
• To build a solid connection to your creative energies.
• A clear understanding of the paradox with which creativity is held in our society.
• To claim your creative birthright – essential for a rich and fulfilling life.
• Recognize new pathways to creative expression in business and everyday life.
• To take bold creative action.
Creativity is held in a paradoxical fashion in our society. While we strongly encourage creativity in our children, we tend to marginalize the value of creativity as adults. We offer adulation and star status to actors, musicians and other artists, yet doubt the creative spirit within ourselves.
Across the ages creative expression has been a hallmark of the human experience. The urge to create is as much a part of our individual experience as it is our human cultural history. From ancient cave paintings to working your mojo in the kitchen with your stereo blasting while no one is looking, creativity will always seek an expression. The Muse will bite. How you choose to respond is your business…
“Creativity: Power, Paradox and Birthright” is a fun - and occasionally irreverent - invitation to explore and respond to creative urges. If you’ve ever dreamed of tapping your creative energies – whether to increase your business bottom line, or simply to expand your range and appreciation for full-out living – this is the place to begin.
“I am now very much centered with the fact that I’m an incredibly creative person. I’m even somewhat artistic. I’ve more confidence in myself, and more trust…”
“Suddenly I got that I could just sit down and write a book. It’s a breakthrough in my ability to see the actual possibility of writing something that people will pick up and read!”
“I'm bitten - I mean smitten..!”
• Class Dates: Thursdays: July 7, 14, 21, 28 (Complimentary intro class: Thursday, June 30, 2005)
• Time: 11:00 AM to 12:15 PM Eastern Time. (8:00 to 9:00 AM PST)
• Tuition: $99
• Materials: Just bring yourself, the biggest piece of paper you can find, (your nice, newly painted wall will work, too…) and something to draw or write with…
• To register: drop a note or call Ken at 518.580.0550.
Mark Brandenburg and I have been revving up the engines over at the CoActive Network's Fatherhood Community. Have a look at the calendar to see what's new. Membership will run you a grin and two minutes of computer time. The grin is optional, of course, but much appreciated...
We've also put together an audio CD - "Ten Secrets of Effective Fathering." Drop me a line to learn how to get one...
More cool stuff coming at Coachville's "Awesome Dads" community! Lots happening - including "A Hero's Journey for Parents." Run over and have a look-see...
More Fatherly resources are available on the Cirrus site.
On the coaching front, I'm setting up sample appointments for the first week in July and beyond. Ready for a 45-minute test drive? Let's set it up! On the house, of course!
Feedback for DadsNews - or a simple "howdy!" - is always welcome. Send me a note!
More cool stuff is available at the Cirrus Leadership website!
Next issue of DadsNews: week of July 11, 2005. Until then, pull out a globe, give it a spin, close your eyes, and point!!!
DadsNews ©2005, Kenneth Mossman, Cirrus Leadership® - Use and distribution permitted and encouraged, providing attribution is... well, attributed!